5 West Nursing

I’m sure you’ve seen it all over the news. Congress has been working on a new economic stimulus package that’s going to cost us close to a trillion dollars, a bill which most Obama administration critics call is the end of capitalism and the dawn of European socialism in the United States. I didn’t think that this was going to happen, however, it would seem like we are headed in that direction thanks to the influencial president, er, speaker of the house Nancy Pelosi. Sometimes it makes me wonder who is behind this bill because president Obama is so far removed, it seems like Pelosi is the one that sits in the oval office. I guess that’s what we get for electing a president who spent more time campaigning than actually getting things done in the senate. Regardless, there is no doubt that president Obama is off to a rocky start… yup, blame it on Bush… that’s if you’re a pinhead. (It’s OK, you’re not the only pinhead around! ) Remember, power in numbers!

Talking points aside, I decided to be part of the solution. Instead of having this “I’m entitled to a handout because I’m a victim” mentality I have actually used my noodles to cook up an economic recovery/stimulus package that will solve most of the issues that plague America today. Ready for it? Here it comes…

I present you the 5 Wester Economic Recovery Package!

What is it? It’s a person on a stationary bike, pedaling away to power up the generator which provides a current to charge the massive 110 volt battery which stores energy, which will eventually make its way to electric distribution centers, which will power our homes! Brilliant, ain’t it?!

How will it solve our current economic crisis? Here’s how…

1) Helps create jobs and keep them in America – it will help create millions of jobs (sky’s the limit), and best of all, it cannot be outsourced! Imagine a few thousand of these units that make up the new power plants of America? In the last few weeks we’ve seen companies slash thousands of jobs, one company, 4000, another 6000, yet another 20000 jobs. With the above setup, there is no excuse that able bodied people will be unemployed.

2) Good for the environment – now we can have really “clean” energy production and decrease our dependence on foreign oil. The only waste created is metabolic waste (you know #2), which is environmentally friendly and biodegradable! You don’t have to worry about global warming on this one.

3) Positive health benefits - not only will it help create jobs, keep them in America, and decrease our dependence on foreign oil for energy, it also has positive health benefits which will lower the cost of healthcare. Now burning calories not only benefit the individual, but the whole community as well. It’s a win-win, what can I say?!

4) Applicable to other industries as well – the future of the automobile is not flying cars or alternative fuel hybrids. No sir! The Flintstones already figured this out!

And there you have it, the 5 Wester Economic Recovery Package!

It is so ridiculously simple and radically brilliant, it will never happen in America. I guess well just have to wait for the government to figure this out. In the meantime thousands more will lose their jobs. Oh well, what can I say?

Hmmm… I wonder if I can sell this idea to China. Just kidding!